A friend of mine has been all but gently nudging me to venture into the shark infested waters that is controversial themes. Now, I have never been one to stir the pot or make a wave. Maybe I have done it for so long that I have come to know a life where I do not want, maybe do not need, to cause ripples. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? You be the judge.
I think controversy differs in definition in the different dictionaries that are our lives. Having stated that, I will describe controversy in my eyes. I find that there are two types of controversy. Of course, there’s the general controversy that gets everyone talking. These are scandals involving topics that colour the news such as who just came out of the closet, abortion, human rights…you know, those topics which you know if so and so were to state their opinion, we’d never stop talking.
Then there’s controversy for me. I might say I am reserved, so often when we are done talking about ‘worldly’ things, I’ll go to my like-minded friend and make shocked faces while recounting the ideas and opinions you so enthusiastically discussed with me.

What causes controversy in my life are the little, day to day ‘life things’ that may just be shocking only to me and my aforementioned like-minded friend. I will, however, try to express these in future and maybe cause the ripples we sometimes need to spice up life.

Rabbit Hole
You never know until you try
They whispered into our ears
The unknown brings chills of fear
Then again, beckons so gently
Curiosity always catches the cat
And down the rabbit hole we went
Where the walls close in on us
And the daylight fades to black

Falling, falling…

                                                                     -Miss Daisy


Last Friday, I had my first spoken word performance. While it was exciting, I will talk about it on a future post. I just thought I’d fore mention it for suspense purposes…yeah, that’s  how I like to keep this relationship (reader-blogger) interesting.

On to what got me online tonight. I wrote a rather special piece that I’d like to dedicate to a dear, special friend and an ardent reader of my work. I hope you all enjoy it.

For You

Behind those beautiful eyes,
Resides a child-like innocence
Teach me, then we’ll both be staring
Wide eyed, watching the world
As the skyline slowly darkens tonight.
Maybe darkness comes upon me
When your sun finally sets
And you lay your head to rest.
Honestly, I could stay up till the morn
To see the sunrise in your eyes
And feel the warmth of your smile
Before the rest of the world does.
I would go as far as asking you
To set down the world from your shoulders
That I alone may lean on you.

                                                                                                        -Miss Daisy

Rose coloured glasses

Lately, I’ve been seeing life a little differently… in a good way.

First off, I must say that my sense of humour has grown, rather, my funny bone. I have found humour in the subtle puns of day to day life and in more of the seemingly ordinary phrases. I say more, because I have always found humour in those phrases. Now, though, it seems a tad too exaggerated. No complaints here.

I believe that when life closes a door, it opens a window to help us deal with it. Because life has caused my rose coloured glasses to fade, I will say that life has closed my windows. In light of this rather unique circumstance, I now have the open door of humour to help me cope. 

It is for that reason that I find myself (I’m not bragging) endowed with, shall I say, the power of enlightenment. I feel as though I know what life is all about. I have been dealt many a blow. I just rolled with the punches. In light of my first point, I need not mention the fact that the pun was intended. Oh, (shrugging) I just did.

I am overwhelmingly empathetic of late. I seem to understand and slightly recognise others’ emotions, more so, the ones on the darker side of the clouds. I also noticed that I have been vicariously experiencing the music I’ve been listening to. I’ve swayed to the highs and said my ‘Amens’ to the lows of all those songs, all of which make complete sense to me. The fact that I created a playlist several days ago, that I’ve had on loop, has absolutely nothing to do with it. 

Having duly explained all this, I can comfortably say that I’ve been though everything the wind could blow my way. I feel like I understand it all- maybe all, except a certain course unit whose notes I’m struggling to get through and the reason why life is not in ‘cinematic 3D’. All in all, I feel a lot wiser and wouldn’t be surprised if I found two more grey hairs sprouting on my head. 

Happy May day.

Phantom pain and other feelings

Phantom Pain

Would it that it were
The extreme awareness
Attached to another’s existence
Then severed like a septic arm
But phantom limbs still hurt
The worst kind of pain.
                                   -Miss Daisy

I had intended on writing a rather sappy post today about my feelings/emotions lately and maybe explaining the piece above. I decided not to ‘lay myself bare’ for the world to see. I will say though, that people are not meant to go through so many emotions in the span of less-than-a-week, as I have…and still am?
I hate sorting through my feelings because I have to do something about them. Lazy Daisy- I think it’s too much work. So I write about them, then ignore them until they sort themselves out. Like magic. Because that’s how life works.

Last Night

Last night we died again, a death so deep
I don’t know about you, but I didn’t want to wake
A calm, quiet and dark kind of sleep
When your eyes open, pretend you’re still under, for my sake.
Stay still my dear, don’t you even stir
I’m dreaming of dancing under rainbows
Gradually, the scene fades into a black blur
The setting sun of being in love’s throes.
The darkness is where we belong anyway
That all familiar, welcoming embrace
Not even once did we long for the light of day
Running after this blackness, the thrill of the chase.
So let us pretend a little while longer, no harm done
I won’t hold it against you when it’s time to rise
Memories made will haunt my days when I’m alone
While I count the hours till the day dies.
                                                                    -Miss Daisy 

Meant to Happen

That scent arouses vivid memories
Blissful moments when time had stopped
Try to hide the gentleness in your eyes
A little mystery never hurt anyone
These things were meant to happen.
Furtive glances stir pools of emotions
Holding back was never easy anyway
Tears over a sad, beautiful tragedy
Outbursts of private revelations
The world is not yet meant to know.
You never could keep a secret
Tell a friend or two, three at most
They can call it anything but love
Is that where you are going?
Those shoes were meant for walking.
Contentment when your paths collide
You can’t always stand at the crossroads
And moving forward is a journey unknown
That could lead you to a better place
Some things are meant to be.
That scent arouses vivid memories
It’s slowly suffocating you from inside
Masochist, you let it choke you
One part sorrow, two parts happiness
These things happen.

                                                   -Miss Daisy

Holiday Tuesday

Yesterday morning, I’d been thinking about the dynamics of friendship. How two people can feel like they’ve known each other all their lives, yet they just met. I have a couple of people in my life with whom I have that connection. By a couple, I mean about two people. I don’t think that’s a bad thing, it probably wouldn’t be as beautiful if there were many such people. It makes it kinda special.
Then I started thinking about writing something that will move hearts to come together, something that will change points of views and provoke thoughts in the minds of great thinkers, something that will be remembered long after I’m gone. I thought of writing a piece so remarkable it would shake your world when you read it.

What I did come up with, may or may not be as brilliant as I’d have dreamed. I wrote a poem in the morning traffic on my way to school. I, however, choose not to have it up for the time being for I have a special plan for it…and I kind of want it to remain like a tiny baby in my hands.
What I will put up in its stead, is a poem I wrote while watching the rain fall outside my window. I bet you will never guess what it’s about!!

Shimmering crystals of light
One two three, they fall down
Sparkly diamonds from above
Soaked up by the ground below
Up close I could number each one
Reach out and take a single droplet
But in the quiet distance
It seems a blurry, misty sheet
Falling diagonally and sometimes vertically
Beating the earth like a great drum
The creatures rise up from underground
To dance in the pouring glory
Won’t you join us then
In a dance of renewal and purification
Where we are brought out of ourselves
And into the oneness of life.

Matters of the heart

Have you ever had the biggest crush in the world on someone? Like a boy (or a girl, for the guys)? And he’s the picture of virtue and perfection? You can’t even see him in your mind’s eye without that ornate marble pedestal he seems to have been born on.
You gawk at him, not too subtly at times, wide eyed and drooling at his beauty and grace. You try to imagine how it feels to exist as he does, with everyone either wanting to be him or be with him. He seems to move in movie like slow motion, gliding on the strip of air just above the ground on which we, mere mortals, tread on.
And when you really think about it (I may have, a little too much), he must be a descendant of the Greek gods of Olympus. His god-father set him to earth to learn how to be responsible, but you know he was sent here to save you, that is if he doesn’t kill you softly with his heart stopping smouldering glance.
You’ve neither spoken to him nor heard him speak. Only the sound of his laughter, like the rolling thunder in the distance have you heard. And so you imagine his voice will be like a perfectly orchestrated symphony. You long for the day the heavens will caress your eardrums with that gloriously melodious voice.
But alas, the paint cracks and falls off the walls. And the glass breaks as the scales fall from your eyes. Your expression of awe turns to one of incredulity and the beautiful background music halts!! You are sadly brought down to earth, to the place that’s the extreme opposite of Mt. Olympus. He spoke to you and it was not what you expected. 

It’s not his voice, it’s fine…perfectly ordinary. It’s what he said…or how he said it? You realise you might have built a castle in your head, whose  mere foundations couldn’t even be dug in real life. He just couldn’t meet the expectations in you had for him. Later that day find yourself in conversation with this boy and you are thinking, ‘This is the boy!! This is the guy?’ You look up to the sky while giving him those furtive glances you ask the heavens, ‘Really?’ You shake your head, for you had lost time in your waking (and dreaming) hours living in fantasies that are just embarrassing when you remember them in light of recent revelations about said crush.

Such is love, or lack thereof. When you wish you’d just held on to his mystery for a little while longer, maybe till the weekend because you have nothing exciting to look forward to. But now, even that is gone. Life’s colours are drained and it’s back to mundane existence.
 Mundane existence has it’s high points, though. I was able to concentrate on other things in life and noticed how beautiful this morning was. Enjoy the pretty sky lights.

The freaking Easter weekend

Happy Easter y’all!!

This Easter weekend could not have come upon me soon enough! Talk about exhaustion. My Easter weekend was very eventful. Things happened in a way that I can only explain with the analogy of the snowball effect, and I rolled with it.

Studio time

The good times began with a studio audition. I pretty much hated how I performed of my song. It was just…bleh. But I got a really good deal and I am so excited and cannot wait to get started. I’ll have more details as the thing unfolds and morphs into Plus I met some really cool people and had a great time afterwards.

Today, I was told that my Achilles heel is avoiding issues. I’m talking about those weird, uncomfortable, touchy issues that have me going against my nature as a woman when I don’t address them. I honestly do not think it’s true. I pick my battles and avoid confrontations. Addressing my issues would cause very many confrontational situations. How do I live like this? Well, you’d be surprised how the brain is capable of repressing memories and thoughts for our well being.

Enjoy the break, guys. I’ll be catching up on school work.

When your hair don’t shine

Let’s play a little game called ‘I have been’. I’ll go first, okay?

I have been so down that my hair lost its shine. I fact, I am so down right now, my hair’s so dull and sad. The first reason is that I spent so much money on a certain cosmetic product mistaking it for another. It was my fault, really. I should have taken time to read the label.
Secondly, I have just been corrected. It has been a week of that, and it’s only Wednesday. While I don’t mind correction, it gets me down for a couple of reasons: It’s always about something that I have been thinking of changing, something I hate people doing but didn’t realise I also do it, or something that I’ve been doing subconsciously all this time but no one (till now) thought to point out.
Oh wait, there’s one more thing that’s getting me even lower in today’s particular situation. While my mistake was corrected in the most gentle of ways, self conscious ol’ me had to get it in my head that every time I see this person who corrected me, said person will always be judging me about it. That never happens, right? I mean, I certainly do not judge people after correcting them.
Every cloud has a silver lining. My silver lining this afternoon’s that this low feeling I have, just generated a post. When I decided to start a blog, I thought my excitement and gusto to write posts (even if not daily) would last forever! I couldn’t possibly see myself having nothing to write about. Till today. I got home thinking how I really had nothing to say. But that changed, clearly.

My view from the front seat- Campaign vehicle
 I just remembered!! The highlight of my morning was the inter campus ride on the school bus today. I love, love, simply LOVE riding in the bus, sitting right at the front next to the door…! Sigh, simple pleasures!
Right next to the door

Before I leave, I make a tribute to love! It’s beautiful, sad, magical and tragic. Check out Thought of You by Ryan Woodward   It’s a beautiful blend of music, dance, art and love! It really is worth your time.